we're blogging at a bar
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
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