HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
