oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Randomize