shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
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You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
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If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
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