I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
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he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
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You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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