How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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