Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
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