Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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