That's when you crack a 10am beer
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
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