Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
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