My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
it glows. i had to have it.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Randomize
