I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize