So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
