At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
