We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
Sober January is a disaster.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
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