I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
