no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
