But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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