I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
