You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
Randomize
