I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Also, beer. Big fan.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
We need to feng shui this bitch.
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