Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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