my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize