You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
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