i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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