also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
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Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
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Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
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