Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
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