so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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