Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
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