I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
