3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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