soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
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