Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
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