Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Randomize
