Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
