i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
