too bad you live with your parents still
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
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