It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize
