I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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