it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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