This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
Randomize
