I'm going to jail i love you
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I deserve this hangover.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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