he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
