I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
it's like heaven, but drunker
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Randomize