I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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