Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
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