nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Randomize
