i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
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