I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
I think a kid would responsible me up
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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