I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize